Below

There is something below the surface.
Something that lingers in subdued defiance.
I can feel it swelling and relaxing
And I fear that it will bubble up,
Erupt and stain my good judgment.

I fight the feeling to let it go.
The essence of a painful release
Hides behind the notion
And coils itself, readying itself.
The intensity of a moment.

If I let the damn break,
I will not survive the backlash.
I could not cope with the consequences,
The retaliation.
The burning of the bridges.

The feeling, although close, can wax and wane.
Before the realization comes,
Indifference will take over
And I will forget the heat of the feeling.
I’ll lye and let the night suppress me.